Thursday, April 18, 2013

A Grief Meditation for Parents Grieving the Loss of Their Baby

This week I have been featured as an "Inspirational Mama" on Beautifully Bohemian Blog.  Check it out by clicking on the button below here:

Now back to the theme of the week - Meditation

During my month of mediation I have tried multiple different guided meditations online.  I have found some I really like and some that I don't find fitting.  I have yet to find one that truly relates to my situation of grieving the loss of an infant or unborn child.  Sometimes in the meditations I do like the guide will ask the mediator to think of happy memories of your deceased loved one in order to bring comfort to you.  I understand that this part of the exercise is supposed to bring healing, but for me it is painful because part of my grief is not having many memories with my child.

Meditations that bring up pain are okay, as in meditations you are supposed to sit with whatever emotions arises, but I thought grieving parents of baby loss like myself might need a more focused guided mediation specifically that relates to the situation we, as grieving baby lost parents, are experiencing.  If mediating on grief works for you, please feel free to try the guided meditation below.  If you would like to meditate to the audio version please click on the link at the bottom of the page.

Namaste (The Light in Me Greats the Light in You),

~Still Breathing...Lindsey   


A Grief Mediation for Parents Grieving the Loss of Their Baby

Sit in a comfortable position or lie on the floor.  Take a few deep breaths and release. On the exhale release the thoughts and feelings from the day.  As you do this, let the muscles in your neck relax, your shoulders drop, your face soften, letting tension you are holding in different parts of your body go.  Feel yourself lighten as you continue to focus on your breath.   As you inhale through your nose bring the breath deep into your belly, filling it with air like a balloon and then slowly exhale through your mouth. Fall into a rhythm with your breathing.  Breathing comfortably, at your own pace, and in your own time.

As you breath and feel comfortable in this space, begin to let whatever emotions arise come and go.  Accepting that they are there, noticing them, and then releasing them.  Letting go of judgement of your thoughts.  Just accepting them as they are and letting them pass.  Now, when you are ready, invite grief in.  Notice what emotions arise as you summon up grief.  Grief can bring up many emotions.  Emotions of love.  Emotions of loss.  Emotions of sadness.  Emotions of happiness.  Let them all arise.  Sit with them.  Accept them. Ask them what they have to teach you. And then let them pass, when they are ready to be released.

Now imagine your child.  Hold your child.  Spend time with your precious baby here.  Caress their hair.  Take in his smile.  Look into her eyes.  Listen to their giggles.  Embrace the feelings you are having with your child in this moment.  Let them come and enjoy this moment with your child.  If you would like, tell your baby all the blessings they have brought into your life.  You can share with them all the love you have for them in your heart.  Listen closely to your child, they will reassure you they already know the depths of your love.  They will reassure you of their safety and that all is right with the universe. They will tell you that you are forgiven by them as there is nothing to be forgiven for. They will tell you that they hope you can find peace as they will let you know they already are at peace.

Spend as much time with your child in this place and moment as you like.  Connecting with the spirit of your child.  Softening some of your grief by accepting its presence.  Making peace with your emotions.  Healing your body and soul.

When you are ready slowly bring yourself back to the present moment.  Remembering that this time with your child is always available to you.  You can visit your child in this place whenever you like.  Until you greet them again, remember what your baby has taught you.  Remember that your baby is at peace and hopes that you find peace within your grieving heart too.

It maybe easier to listen to this mediation in audio format.  To do so please visit the YouTube audio mediation of this script by clicking on the picture below.




  1. Thanks for posting this, Lindsey. I gave it a try, and was able to release some grief. Next time, I think I'll use the audio version (I went ahead with reading it through before I saw you provided an audio link). Again, I really appreciate the post.

  2. Thank you for sharing this L. I'm making a note to come back (pinning of course so I remember) and try this out. Exactly something I'd like to try! xoxo

    1. Thanks Kristine. I am a huge fan of your blog. It means a lot that someone like you would use something of mine. Thanks! I use your manual on 'When a Friends Baby Dies' a lot.

  3. Thank you for this. I needed it tonight. I started reading your blog earlier this week after my world fell apart--I found out at a regular ob checkup that my 15 week old baby was dead. Getting to know Nora over these past days has been healing.

  4. Really great.Thanks a lot for your writing.On the off chance that connection is "natural" then grief is a "natural" emotion that is accomplished when one is separated from what is beloved.On the off chance that grief is managed viably it can launch knowledge. Be that as it may,on the off chance that it is managed unskillfully, entanglements may emerge.The ordinary grief response may show physically,emotionally,cognitively and/or behaviorally.Grief may have phases.the determination of grief could be fulfilled by creating mindfulness.The act of mindfulness (additionally called satipatthana) underlines being mindful and surrendering to the natural and present minute states of brain and body.This is essentially a Theravadin Buddhist approach.In any case, components of its practice could be found inside normal undertaking situated and steady grief advising techniques and additionally some present day psychotherapies.Be happy.:)
    ~Leona Ortiz.


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