Monday, April 15, 2013

Letters to Nora - April 14th, 2013

April 14th, 2013

Hi My Sweet Nora,

Although it is technically Spring in Minnesota, it has not arrived yet.  It's gray and gloomy and we have about five inches of snow on the ground.  It makes me depressed.  I was hoping for an earlier spring to help me cheer up.  No luck.  

So instead I decided to do an activity to honor you this week.  (I do stuff all the time to honor you, but this one was different).  There's this woman, Ellen, who is this super cool social-activist lady who has a talk show on T.V. that everyone loves.  I love her too, and I heard about this #Whoabelly project she was doing on Instagram for this upcoming Mother's Day, where she has women who are pregnant send in pictures of them with a cool belly shot of them and their baby.  (I have to tell you I've looked at some of these belly shots and our belly shots are way better.) You were the cutest baby.  You made my belly look good!  
But, I thought to myself when I saw these pictures.  Well what about me, Nora?  What about us?  We are still mother and daughter, even though you are no longer with me on earth that doesn't change the fact that I am your mother, right?  I thought you would agree.  So I decided to send pictures of my painted belly to raise awareness about Mothers and Daughters or Sons like you and me.  Mothers who have to parent their children on earth without their babies with them.  
Nora, did you know that 1 out of 4 women experience pregnancy loss from miscarriage, pre-term labor, stillbirth, or other factors?  I did not know this until I lost you at full term.  So I thought we could raise awareness by sending the following picture into the super cool social-activist lady, Ellen, who has that talk show.  
Maybe she would bring light to this subject and dedicate one of her shows to pregnancy loss of all kinds.  She could bring the STILL Project to her show which is a documentary about parents' stories about stillbirth.  Or, she could have the director and writer of Return to Zero interviewed, which is a motion picture being made with Minnie Driver about one family's true story of their life after the stillbirth of their baby.  Or she could highlight the writers of Still Standing Online Magazine who do amazing things for women who experience all types of pregnancy loss including miscarriage.  Or she could work with March of Dimes to help bring awareness to pre-term births and their prevalence.

Unfortunately, this would be fitting, as that super cute mommy who sent in that picture of her belly as an egg in a basket to Ellen and won tickets to her show, lost her baby that same day to what I think is was pre-term labor.  Oh, Nora, how my heart goes out to that mom and dad. So Nora, taking these pictures and sending them to that super cool talk show lady to raise awareness is worth a shot, right?  For your enjoyment honey, I have included more of the  pictures of the belly painting project below.  I hope you like them.

Oh, Nora, I really enjoyed doing this project.  It was a way for me and you to reconnect and for me to imagine you in my belly once again.  But in the end honey, I knew, like your time with me here on earth, it would not last.  After your Aunt was done taking a million pictures of the painting of you on my belly, I hopped in the shower and with one quick gush of water against my stomach, the picture of you washed away with colors swirling in the drain, and in that moment you were gone again.  It was just like our time together before, while you were there I was celebrating and enjoying every moment with you, and then out of nowhere, and in an instant, you were gone and my hopes and dreams for you went down the drain; this time it was the paint.

Well my sweet Nora, I hope you enjoy the pictures.  All this was done out of love for you and to bring light to mother and child relationships like ours, because we really are "different kinds of mothers."  But Nora, I am so proud to be your mother and would do it all over again, even if nothing changed.  

Love Always & Forever,


P.S. If people believe pregnancy loss would be a good topic for the super cool activist lady's T.V. show, Ellen, then they could e-mail this story to her, or share your own story by clicking here.  

P.P.S. Nora, the super awesome belly painting lady was Cindy Trusty.  She does kids parties too.


  1. Lindsey, this is a beautiful idea!!! I often think of Ellen when I think of who out there might help get our message out there. It seems like she'd not shy away from it, you know?

  2. An incredibly beautiful tribute Lindsey. Wishing you peace as you walk this journey <3

  3. What a beautiful project for grieving and awareness. Sending love to you today Lindsey.

  4. Lindsey, your story is so heart-breaking...but you are handling it in such a beautiful and uplifting way. I hope you succeed in bringing more awareness to your cause!

  5. Beautiful!!! I have sent an email to the Ellen Show with a link to this blog entry. I certainly hope that they so something with your suggestions. ((((hugs)))) Pamela

  6. I love reading your blog Lindsey! I always think of little Nora when I am at the Schuchard's and see her little hands and feet that are displayed in the living room! Hopefully see you this summer at the lake :)

    Have a wonderful day!


    1. Thanks Amanda! We look forward to seeing you too. I know we will be up there for the 4th.

  7. Lindsey, I recently found your blog today and think this is a wonderful idea, especially to have an episode dedicated to this. I recently lost my daughter on March 5th. I was 34 weeks about to go on 35 weeks. This has been a tough time for me as you know and I'm glad I found your blog.

  8. What a great idea! I love it. I got this link from an another angel mommy friend of mine. Our losses have been 5 and 2 years ago. But our daughters are never far from our hearts, thoughts and actions. I emailed ellen last year after our dreams of adoption came true. I too wish she or someone with a national platform would bring awareness to the very real and devastating loss that is stillbirth. We have a small little support group on facebook called Stillbirth and Infant Loss Support group. It's a closed group, but you just have to ask to join. It helps. Love the painting. Great. Great. Great!

  9. I will look up that group and try to join. Thanks for the info.


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